Using both hands, I raise a kettlebell from the floor, bring it back through\u00a0 my legs, and then, with elbows locked, swing it in front of me to shoulder level, snapping my hips forward as I do.\u00a0 I hear my sternum pop with the effort. \u00a0With a broken tail bone and coming off of a rather undisciplined year, I feel a mix of satisfaction and pain as I round out the set of two-armed kettlebell swings.<\/p>\n
My brother\u2019s words come back to me, \u201cYou know that CrossFit is hard, don\u2019t you?\u201d<\/p>\n
Of course! \u00a0I just had the luxury of not thinking about it until I was in a frosty garage gym with an ex-military drill<\/span> CrossFit instructor and felt the cold resistance of cast iron in my hands.<\/p>\n The workout isn\u2019t complicated \u2013 usually just a handful of exercises performed in a 15-20 minute time period. \u00a0It\u2019s the part about doing each exercise or set over and over, often to the point of muscle fatigue, that had escaped me when I enthusiastically signed up.<\/p>\n The Russian body-builder in my head brings it back to me loud and clear as I swing the kettlebell forward: \u201cDavai, Estormy \u2013 eshyio odna!<\/em>\u201d \u00a0Come on, Stormy, do one more! \u00a0The voice is gruff, firm, unrelenting \u2013 \u00a0the kind of imaginary voice I needed to conjure up to get me through the routine.<\/p>\n And how does one acquire such voices? \u00a0By spending time in a dank gym in the backlands of Northern Russia with large men who wonder what the hell you\u2019re doing on their turf.<\/p>\n Lifting weights and doing calisthenic exercises have been some of my favorite athletic activities since I was first introduced to them in a girl\u2019s phys ed class at the age of 14. \u00a0I wasn\u2019t coordinated \u2013 still am not \u2013 and was not the type of person to get involved in team sports, choreographed routines, or anything with a ball. \u00a0But, working out at the gym was something I seemed to be able to do well, and enjoyed.<\/p>\n Later in high school and college, my favored exercises were a source of amusement to friends here who laughed at my supposed \u201cSchwarzenegger neck\u201d and to my foreign hosts, particularly in South American and former Soviet countries where women did little exercise outside of aerobic dance. \u00a0Things have certainly changed over the years, but at the time when I lived in these countries, there were simply very few women \u2013 outside of those engaged in state and school-run athletics programs \u2013 participating in higher-impact physical activity.<\/p>\n So, seeing a girl with biceps was an oddity. \u00a0Seeing two girls in a cold gym in Northern Russia was even more odd, it seemed, from the looks my friend and I got from the gym\u2019s natural inhabitants when we went there. \u00a0But we persisted, and made friends that soon encouraged our \u201cunfeminine\u201d behavior.<\/p>\n Since then, I\u2019ve been less diligent about my gym routine, spending more time running and occasionally biking without making great improvements in speed or endurance. \u00a0This year, I decided to change that. \u00a0CrossFit popped up on the radar and, after the gym owner convinced me it would improve my running and make the crazy trail running event <\/a>I was training for more manageable, I decided to give it a try.<\/p>\n After the first week of CrossFit, I had to deal with the realization that I\u2019ve slipped. \u00a0Getting back into a routine, improving my form, and increasing my ability to do the workouts is hard, but it seems to be challenging me more mentally than physically. \u00a0Sometimes, I get so drained during the workouts that I want to quit. \u00a0And sometimes, I get so frustrated when I can\u2019t complete an exercise well that I wonder what I\u2019m doing there.<\/p>\n Which brings me back to the voice in my head. \u00a0The Russian gets me through the squats and push-ups. \u00a0He pushes me on the kettlebell swings. \u00a0And, he keeps me from collapsing flat on the ground when I am struggling through my third set of a dozen burpees.<\/p>\n \u201cHorosho. \u00a0Molodetz, Estormy!<\/em>\u201d \u00a0Good job, Storm!<\/p>\n Am I crazy? \u00a0Maybe. \u00a0But, hey, whether you think it\u2019s the voices or the workouts that make me seem nuts, at least I\u2019ve made it through and feel better off for having done it.<\/p>\n